That summer, when I was eighteen, Chloe and I finally crossed that line.
Afterward, I was too excited to sleep a wink, believing my six-year-long secret crush had finally come true.
Until the next day, I overheard her friends teasing her:
Wow, Chloe, you totally snagged the hottest guy in class.
I felt a flush of embarrassment, about to slip away unnoticed.
Then Chloe's nonchalant reply drifted over.
"I want to go after Jaxon, the ice hockey star from school. I'm just worried he'll think I'm too inexperienced."
"So, I just used Liam to practice my moves."
I didn't say a word. In the last possible moment, I quietly switched my university application from Washington D.C. to Chicago.

Chloe's words hit me like a sudden, brutal lightning strike from a clear sky.
My mind instantly went blank.
In that sweltering summer afternoon, I felt an icy coldness spread through my body.
The conversation in the classroom continued, though they seemed to pause for a beat before someone spoke again.
"Only Chloe would say that. The hottest guy in class is just practice for her."
Chloe chuckled, unconcerned.
"Don't be silly. He's not exactly losing out, is he?"
Someone immediately chimed in.
"True, true. Liam is pretty lean, compared to Jaxon... well, his build just isn't the same."
Chloe, annoyed, playfully tossed a book at him, cutting off his comment.
"It was just a heat-of-the-moment thing, the vibe was there, and honestly, he looked like he was about to burst."
They all exchanged knowing glances, teasing her.
"So Liam's the quiet type on the outside, a total wild card underneath!"
"Oh, wow, Chloe, your charm is just too much. Of course, you'd take the opportunity when it's handed to you."
"Liam's been after you for years, he finally got what he wanted. He's probably completely obsessed with you now."
The laughter in the room clearly intensified.
My hands clenched into tight fists.
It took every ounce of my strength to stay upright, to keep from collapsing at the classroom door.
Footsteps approached from the end of the corridor.
I snapped back to reality, bolting from the scene.
In a panic, I rushed into a bathroom stall.



Chloe's words echoed in my mind, syllable by syllable.
They utterly shredded every last piece of my self-respect.
If I hadn't heard it with my own ears, I would never have believed that the person who'd been so intimately entwined with me, who'd seemed to lose herself completely in my arms just last night, was the same person.
So, you could do something that intimate, even without love.
You could lie and deceive, even in the most passionate, irrational moments.
What I'd foolishly believed was our destiny, was nothing more than a punchline in their conversations.
The more I thought about it, the more miserable I became.
A long while later.
My phone buzzed with a new message.
It was Chloe.
[Just cab it home. My friends are having a party tonight, and it's not really convenient for you to come.]
I didn't reply.
I stared at the message, silent for a long time.
From dusk till dawn yesterday, Chloe and I had been all over each other, again and again.
Finally, we were both exhausted. Before I fell asleep in her arms, she was still whispering softly to me.
"It was our first time, and we weren't fully prepared. You really went all out tonight."
Back then, I thought she genuinely cared about me, that I had finally found my happiness.