After My Boyfriend Got Allergic to Cat Fur, I Broke Up

1: 1

Covering a coworker's shift, I ended up treating the patient who walked inmy own boyfriend.

His chart showed that this year alone, he'd registered at the clinic a hundred times for cat-fur allergies and been rushed to the emergency room thirty-eight of them.

I dropped my voice and pressed him. "Don't you know you have severe asthma? Too much exposure to cat fur could kill you."

He didn't recognize me behind the mask. He only smiled and explained.

"There's nothing I can do. My girlfriend's depression is so bad, keeping a cat is the only thing that lifts her mood."

"She hasn't been well lately, so I've had to take care of the cat myself."

"If it makes her smile a little more, a little suffering on my part is nothing."

I froze.

Because of his allergy, I had once given away with my own hands the cat I'd raised for ten years.

So this girlfriend of hiswho was she?

...

The tears came before I could stop them.

I forced my head down and pulled my mask higher.

But Martin Henson caught the whole slip anyway.

"Doctor... are you all right?"

I'd been up all night doing surgery and training the interns, so my voice was already hoarse. Martin didn't recognize it.

I waved him off quickly.

"It's nothing... it's just... I was just moved by your love story."

"Mr. Henson... you really are a good man."

Martin scratched at his face, swollen from the allergy until it looked puffed up like a balloon.

But the smile in his eyes stayed just as bright.

"A man should give in to his partner more, that's all. Life isn't easy for a girl, so of course you spoil her."

But when we'd first talked about moving in together, that wasn't what Martin had said.

Over the two cats I kept, we'd had a vicious fight.

"Barbara Gilbert! You just don't love me! In your heart those two cats matter more than my life!"

"I love you, I can give in for youbut not the cats! The cats put my life at risk!"

Back then his allergy only triggered rhinitis, nowhere near as bad as it was now.

But for his health, and to be with him sooner.

I gave away the cats I'd raised for ten years all the same.

Casey and Morgan had been with me since I graduated.

I'll never forget the pitiful look in their eyes and their low, wailing cries as they were loaded into the airline carriers.

Martin had been touched at the time, but all he did was hold me and comfort me for a little while.

"My baby has given up so much for me."

"I didn't pick the wrong person. Lovers are supposed to give and yield to each other."

Back then I believed that too.

But only now do I understandso it turned out his real love was the kind that could endure anything for someone.

Something seemed to open up in Martin.

"Actually, Doctor, since you're a woman toothere's a lot of things I don't know who to ask about."

"I wanted to ask, what makes a girl feel better? For an illness of the mind like this, besides patient company and taking her medication, what else can I do?"

My voice caught.

"How about... you tell me your story?"

The Martin who was so cold and distant with me now talked on like water spilling over a bank.

From what he described, I pieced together who his "girlfriend" was.

His girl next door, his childhood sweetheart. Lois Mason.

But when he was with me, all he ever did was talk about how much he couldn't stand Lois.

"That awful womanwhen we were kids she developed faster than me and used it to bully me, like some tomboy."

"Now she's grown, and she's come down with some precious little case of depression. Hah. Serves her right. Threatening to die on everyone all day long. It's honestly disgusting."

"That's exactly the kind of woman I hate most. Barbara, an independent woman like you is so much better."

Swallowing it down again and again, I dredged up every scrap of professional ethics I had and told Martin a great deal about what to watch for with depression patients.

Martin nodded and nodded.

"Thank you, Doctor. I understand now. It really does take a woman to understand a woman."

The truth was, I'd gone numb all over.

Then, all at once, Martin reached out toward me.

"Doctor, actuallyyour voice, and your eyes, they're a little like my girlfriend's."

2: 2

While Martin was off picking up his medication, I pulled up Lois's photos and covered the lower half of her face.

No matter how I compared it to my own, it didn't really match.

The voice matched even less.

For a moment I couldn't tell whether the "girlfriend" Martin had described at the end was me or Lois.

That night, back home,

I couldn't stop myself from sinking onto the couch and rewatching the videos of Annie and Angel.

Back then I'd just graduated, living alone in the sprawling sea of New York.

The pressure from home, the exhaustion of work, the private chaos of being on my own.

If it hadn't been for Annie and Angel keeping me company, my depression probably would have swallowed me whole.

They'd nudge me with their fuzzy little heads, roll over and show me their bellies just to make me smile.

And yet I

Yes, Martin had paid for a boarding place with excellent conditions.

But that didn't change the fact that I'd given them up for love.

My hands started trembling, a symptom I hadn't felt in years.

Before I knew it, I was slapping myself hard across the face.

Martin lunged forward and caught my hands.

"Barbara, what's gotten into you?"

He'd taken a strong antihistamine, and his face had mostly returned to normal, just a little flushed.

When his eyes caught the two kittens on the phone screen, a flicker of guilt passed through them.

"Aw, so you've just been missing Annie and Angel."

"If you miss them, then go visit them at the boarding place. I'll go with you."

"Just, these next few days are too busy. Give it a little while."

He drew me into his arms.

He was still wearing the black sweater from the clinic that morning, only he'd cleaned it up carefully, brushed off most of the cat fur.

Still, I found a few strands of it on the back.

Over all these years, I'd missed those two cats plenty.

Sometimes I'd have wanted to go see them three times in a single day.

And every time, Martin would smile and go with me.

"My girlfriend gave up so much for me. The least I can do is take her to see her cats."

Back then, that still moved me.

"Martin"

I slowly pulled free of his arms and looked up at him.

"I don't want to just visit them anymore. I want to bring them home."

The smile in his eyes slowly faded.

"Don't worry, I'd never let the cats near you. I know you're allergic. Look how big the place is. I'll partition off a separate space just for them."

"I promise I'll clean it every single day. You won't have to lift a finger. I won't let a single strand of fur drift onto you."

When I finished, I met his cold, impatient expression again.

Like he was looking at a fool.

Only then did it hit me how ridiculous I sounded.

"Barbara, haven't we been over this a long time ago?"

"Your feelings against my health, is that even a comparison worth making?"

"And besides, your job keeps you so busy. In the end it'd all come down to me taking care of them anyway, wouldn't it?"

Every word I'd meant to say caught in my throat.

I wanted to demand answers, wanted to scream.

But the facts were already laid out plain. There was no point making a scene.

No surprise there.

That night, a cold war broke out between Martin and me.

"Barbara, don't be so unreasonable."

He moved into the guest room.

And I lay in bed tossing and turning, my head full of the way Martin looked when the cat fur set off his allergy.

And the way my coworkers at the clinic had talked.

"What kind of love could make a man risk his own life like that?"

"That girl must have saved the world in a past life. She'd have to be one incredible woman!"

I stared at the ceiling until dawn.

Finally I pulled out my phone and opened a chat window that had been silent for a very long time.

Maybe is it too late for me to come find you now?

Almost instantly, the phone showed: the other person is typing

It's never too late.

Another minute passed.

Have you been through something painful?

3: 3

Without a second thought, I bought a one-way ticket far away and handed my resignation to the hospital.

The handover would take a month.

The next day.

Martin came in for treatment again.

"Doctor, I'm really sorry. Troubling you again like this."

He launched into his usual rambling account of how the attack had come on.

"I didn't go home last night, and today my girlfriend's depression flared up again. She won't even take care of the cat."

"She's so demanding, wants me to brush the cat every single day, so I"

I glanced at the test results without expression.

Every one of his readings had climbed into the danger zone.

"Look, honestly, I get it. Girls need to feel secure. But last night I really had no choice, it was an obligation I couldn't get out of."

I couldn't hold back anymore. My hands shook as I pulled off my mask.

"So being with me counts as an obligation you couldn't get out of?"

"Martin, don't you owe me an explanation?"

In that instant.

Time seemed to freeze.

And every question I'd carried finally came undone.

No wonder Martin had so rarely come back to the place we rented together this past year.

No wonder our wedding date kept getting pushed back, again and again.

"You could have told me sooner, you know."

"Really."

I called a colleague and moved to leave in a rush.

But Martin grabbed me hard from behind.

"Barbara, let me explain. You've got it wrong"

"Lois and I grew up together, you know that."

"I only did it out of respect for both our families"

"And calling her my girlfriend, that just meant... a friend who happens to be a woman."

He said it with such righteous conviction.

But it made me sick enough to throw up.

Even after silently reciting medical ethics and professional conduct ten thousand times in my head, in that moment I couldn't stop myself. I raised my hand and slapped him hard across the face.

"Martin, don't touch me. You disgust me."

I don't remember how I got out through all the crowds at the hospital.

All I know is that we made an ugly scene, a violent screaming match.

In the end.

I'd clawed Martin's face raw.

And he tore me down to nothing.

"Fine, so I like Lois, so what?!"

"If you hadn't been so paranoid all the time, if that lousy job of yours weren't so busy, always brushing off our dates, would I have gone to Lois for something to hold on to?!"

I couldn't stop shaking.

I clutched the fresh lab report inside my white coat.

Hospital work was demanding to begin with. Going two days and two nights without rest was nothing unusual.

I simply didn't have the energy left, after burning through my body, to go fishing with him too.

And besides...

He was born with an allergic constitution. It wasn't only the cat fur.

Even the old professor had said his was a rare constitution, very hard to cure.

But I refused to believe it.

I'd spent these years buried in the research, and only recently had I finally gotten somewhere.

I'd been thinking that once this batch of the specialized drug passed approval and could go into mass production.

It would be my wedding gift to him.

Not so I could keep a cat.

But so his life could be a little better.

All at once, I didn't even have the strength left to fight.

"Martin, let's break up."

4: 4

After that, Martin never contacted me again.

I couldn't be bothered to reach out either. I just poured myself into getting ready for life after quitting.

Messages kept popping up on my phone.

I looked at a few places in Asheville. See if any of them fit what you need.

I already asked about the paperwork ahead of time. Here are the documents, take a look.

Barbara, don't worry. I've always been here.

Everything churned in me at once. I told myself I wanted to stay calm, but I couldn't, no matter how I tried.

Another message popped up.

Babe, look, Angel threw up fur again, come deal with it quick.

Annie's got diarrhea too, it's so gross.

The sender was Lois.

Two videos followed right after.

One ragdoll, one golden shaded.

Those were my Annie and Angel!

In the videos, both cats had tears streaming down, their cheeks sunken, their eyes dull.

Nothing like the videos I used to see from the boarding place!

No wonder. This past year, whenever I wanted to visit the cats, Martin hadn't been as eager as before.

I sat there in silence for a full two minutes.

On her end, Lois recalled the messages right on cue.

Ugh, sent that to the wrong person, don't get the wrong idea. That was meant for my own boyfriend.

I couldn't hold my anger back any longer. I drove straight to Lois's place.

The door opened, and I met her taunting smile head-on.

So you think my cats are cute? Came to see my cats?

Give me back my Annie and Angel!

I raised my hand high, but in the end I didn't bring it down. I just barged past her into the apartment and carried my Annie and Angel out.

After all this time, Annie and Angel still knew me.

The moment they saw me they cried out and threw themselves into my arms, rubbing their heads slowly against me, as if they'd suffered something terrible.

Anger and guilt tangled together.

I pulled out my phone right there.

I'm changing my flight. I'm leaving tonight.

He was quiet for barely three seconds.

Then he replied with one word: Okay.

Back home, I packed my bags as fast as I could.

But the tears came anyway, and I couldn't stop them.

When we first rented this apartment, there was nothing here, just a broken-down shell.

Martin spent so much time fixing up every corner of it with his own hands.

Everything was designed around my tastes, my sense of style, and it cost him several months of his salary.

I used to think he was being too serious about it, wasting money, when it was only a temporary rental.

But he'd answered me so solemnly: The rental's temporary. My love for you isn't.

Barbara, I really do want to build a life with you.

Now, looking at every little detail in this rented place, all I felt was how bitterly ironic it was.

So I decided not to take anything at all. I just wanted to leave with the two cats as soon as possible.

But the second I opened the door, I ran into Martin, seething with rage.

His eyes were red, and he raised his hand high to strike.

Happy now? Who gave you the right to go make trouble for Lois?!

I told you, Lois has severe depression. The only thing that makes her feel a little better is having a cat!

You abandoned the cats anyway, so what's wrong with letting Lois keep them?!

His hand didn't come down. Instead he shoved a photo Lois had sent him in my face.

An old, worn-out picture that had clearly been passed around for years.

Do you have any idea? Because you took Lois's cat away, she's cut her wrists now!

If anything happens to Lois, I'm not done with you!

Real disappointment is when you don't even have the strength to fight.

I just stared at him blankly, then slowly pried his hand off me.

But Annie and Angel are my cats.

Martin, please move. The courier company will be here any minute.

It was only then.

Only then did Martin notice the suitcases stacked by the door.

Barbara Gilbert, aren't you full of ideas now! I just paid Lois a little more attention because she has depression. Do you really need to run away from home over that?

Hauling out a few junk boxes, who are you trying to scare?

I shook my head.

I'm not running away from home.

I'm breaking up with you.

Martin, I've said it a thousand times.

Martin pressed a hand to his forehead in irritation, his face full of impatience.

Barbara Gilbert, how long are you going to keep this up?! Right now Lois is about to kill herself over losing her cats, I don't have time to waste on you! Hand Annie and Angel over, now!

Barbara Gilbert, can you not be so vicious?! A person's life is at stake here!

In the struggle.

Martin shoved me to the ground.

Barbara

The next moment, a dark figure rushed in and kicked Martin clear across the room.

A deep voice, low and edged with fury, cracked through the room like thunder.

Get your hands off my girlfriend!