They Treated Me Like Dirt, So I Vanished for Ten Years

Through college I worked and studied at the same time, coming home every day wrung out, and there was never once a decent dish left for me at the table.

The barbecue ribs were picked down to the bone, the baked fish to the spine.

A few limp vegetable leaves floated in the soup bowl.

In the living room, my parents and my brother were laughing themselves sick in front of the TV.

I had no strength to argue, so I put water on to boil for noodles and started washing dishes.

My mother heard the noise and rushed in to shut off the burner.

"You think gas is free?"

"Mom, I'm hungry. I just want to cook a bowl of noodles."

"Cook what noodles? Didn't we leave you food? A grown girl like you, still this picky?"

I looked at the plates of scraps, leftovers that looked like slop, and let out a sigh. "You expect me to eat that?"

"Why can't you eat it?"

She scooped a little rice into the bowl of bare bones. "That barbecue sauce smells good, doesn't it? Don't waste it. Hurry up and eat, then wash the dishes."

I didn't take the bowl. My eyes just went hot as I asked her, "Mom, I work to pay my own tuition. I'm really tired. Can't I have one bowl of hot noodles?"

"No!"

"Either you eat that rice, or you go hungry."

"I don't know who spoiled you into these disgusting habits."

"And another thing. What does a girl need school for?"

"Work a couple of years, then find a man and get married."

"You actually think you'll change your fate with knowledge?"

...

Under my mother's contemptuous stare.

I bit down hard on my lip.

The tears spilled out before I could stop them.

I'd lost count of how many times I'd cried.

There was nowhere to put the hurt in my chest.

In my parents' eyes.

Nothing I did was ever right.

When other kids brought home an award, their parents would be happy about it for days.

But mine?

The moment I brought an award home.

Their faces would go long.

They'd curse me for showing off.

It was just a worthless piece of paper.

And after the cursing.

They'd toss it straight in the trash.

But my brother?

Bottom of his class, fighting, skipping school, smoking.

Not even one semester in.

Called out by teachers to bring in his parents dozens of times.

By any reason, they should have straightened him out long ago.

They didn't.

Instead, whatever my brother asked for, whatever he wanted to eat.

They gave him all of it.

"What's going on here?"

My father's voice came closer.

He walked into the kitchen and saw my tears.

His brow creased slightly. "You upset your mother again?"

I shook my head, biting my lip. "I didn't."

"Still arguing back?"

"Look at your mother, she's shaking she's so angry!"

My father never asked what had actually happened.

He just laid the whole blame on me.

My mother said, "Your daughter's being picky."

My father's face fell at once.

"Picky again?"

"Every time we leave you food."

"You won't touch it."

"You think you're some rich man's daughter?"

"Your stomach too delicate for it?"

"Won't eat, huh? Then from now on, you don't eat at all!"

What does it mean to say my parents treated me like a weed?

Most people probably can't understand it.

After all, among people my age,

who wasn't spoiled rotten by their parents?

But I understood it down to my bones.

In their eyes,

I really was worth less than a weed on the roadside!

My father angrily dumped the food from my bowl into the trash.

Then he took the noodles away too.

You won't eat? Then you don't get to eat from now on.

We're an ordinary family.

We can't afford to raise a delicate little princess like you.

Holding the noodles, my father took my mother's hand and left the kitchen.

Before he went, he didn't forget to order me Wash the dishes before you leave.

I choked back everything I felt and wiped away my tears.

Even though I was so tired I could barely stand,

I obediently washed the dishes.

That night, when I went to sleep,

I was so hungry I kept drinking water, just to give myself a little sense of fullness.

Then I hurried to sleep.

The next day,

I got ready to go back to school to study like always.

But the door was locked from the outside.

Mom, Dad, Dylan.

Is anyone home?

Why did you lock me in my room?

Soon,

my mother's voice came from outside the room.

The moment you admit you were wrong,

is the moment we let you out!

I froze, What did I do wrong?

Looks like you still haven't realized what your problem is.

Sit in there and think about what you've done.

After that,

I heard my parents leave the house.

I couldn't get out, couldn't go to school, couldn't go to work.

Since I'd gone almost the entire previous day without eating,

I was dizzy with hunger, no strength left in my body.

I don't know how much time passed.

My vision went black and I fainted from hunger.

When I opened my eyes again,

my parents and my brother were all gathered around my hospital bed.

Seeing me open my eyes,

Dylan sneered, Sis, aren't you being dramatic? You skipped one dinner and you fainted?

You're not faking it to get Mom and Dad to feel sorry for you, are you?

I gritted my teeth and shook my head, I didn't fake fainting.

You still dare to argue?

My mother raised her hand to slap me,

but my father stopped her.

My heart lifted. I thought my father would finally show me some love.

Instead he said, Too many people around in a hospital.

We'll deal with her once we're home.

I stared at him blankly, unable to believe those words had come from my own father's mouth.

When we got home from the hospital,

my mother, beside herself with rage, grabbed a fistful of my hair and slapped me twice, hard.

You worthless girl, do you have any idea how much time we lost because you were in the hospital for a day?

Your dad and I don't have to work? Don't have to earn a living?

Why not just let you starve to death?

The more she talked, the angrier she got.

She slapped me twice more, hard.

Dylan clapped nonstop. "Good one, Mom!"

This time.

I didn't fight back, didn't struggle, didn't cry.

It was like the soul had been pulled clean out of me.

I just watched them, my face blank.

Until she wore herself out cursing.

When she let go, my father glanced at his watch and said flatly, "Don't waste time on her. Time to take our boy out for a steak dinner."

"Hmph."

My mother shot me a vicious glare.

She went to her room and threw a few things together.

Then the three of them left.

Maybe it crossed their minds that I was, after all, their own flesh and blood.

They couldn't very well let me actually starve to death.

Before they left.

My father turned back and told me, "You've been on an IV all day, you're too weak. We won't drag you along."

"We'll box some up and bring it back for you."

"Don't worry, this time there's meat!"

I didn't say a word.

My mother spat. "All that studying's rotted your brain."

"Guzzling that toxic feel-good garbage online every day."

"You actually think knowledge changes your fate?"

"You don't know your place!"

After they left, I dabbed a little medicine on my swollen face myself.

When they got back from their meal.

Sure enough, they'd boxed up meat for me.

But this meat... it looked like someone had already been chewing on it!

And when I looked closer.

These few lumps were nothing but the kind of gristle you can't bite through!

"Sis."

"Mom and Dad brought this meat back just for you."

"No excuse not to eat it this time, right?"

Dylan looked at me, smug all over his face.

My mother frowned. "Well? Eat it."

I didn't say anything.

But I let my actions speak my silent protest.

I dumped the scraps in the box straight into the trash.

Dylan let out a screech. "Sis, why'd you throw it out?"

"That meat's expensive."

"I didn't even want to waste it on myself."

My parents' faces changed in an instant.

"You little brat, have you lost your mind?"

"We went out of our way to bring that back for you."

"And you just throw it away?"

I didn't have the strength to argue with them.

I only asked back, quietly.

"Brought back just for me?"

"This is the stuff you couldn't finish, couldn't even chew through, isn't it?"

"I'm your daughter."

"I'm not your dog!"

Nobody expected it from me, the one who always took it lying down, who never once protested or talked back.

That I'd dare to challenge them now.

"So your wings have hardened, have they?"

"You dare to defy us now?"

My father glowered at me, his face dark.

My mother's eyes went cold as ice.

She fetched the electrical cord she often used to beat me and said in a chilling voice, "Let's just see how tough your bones really are!"

Crack!

The moment Mom finished speaking, down came that cord, the one that carried every painful memory I had.

Each blow didn't split my skin open, but the pain shook me all the way down, my soul trembling along with my body.

Apologize!

Mom barked the word.

I didn't move.

Oh, listen to that. Tough bones, huh.

Let's see how many more you can take!

She swung the cord.

Again and again.

The pain went numb through my whole body, my arms and back losing all feeling.

Before, I would have cried and begged her to stop.

But this time.

I didn't move, didn't cry, didn't beg.

I just let her hit me.

The minutes dragged by.

Mom lost count of how many times she'd struck me.

All she knew was that her arm ached and her hand had gone numb.

Seeing that I still wouldn't give in.

She threw the cord aside.

Then she dragged me out to the balcony.

You don't admit you're wrong today, don't even think about coming back inside to sleep.

And so I stood on that balcony all night.

That whole night, the wind cutting straight through me.

It settled something in me for good.

Once they left for work and my brother left for school.

First I went to the pharmacy and bought some ointment to rub on the welts.

Then I went to the diner to quit.

And just as I was quietly planning my escape.

I found out that the money I'd earned working.

All of it was gone.

Meanwhile my brother had a new, expensive game console.

I asked him if he'd stolen my money.

He denied it flat out.

I was about to tell Mom and Dad.

But the second they got home from work.

My brother went running out to the balcony, crying and screaming.

Sis, you're framing me.

I never took your money.

I saved up and bought the console myself.

You're jealous that Mom and Dad are good to me, and you hate them for how they treat you.

So you decided to frame me.

You want to make Mom and Dad hate me, so you can be the favorite instead!

Sis, you're really vicious, but I won't let you get away with it.

I'll prove my innocence with my life!

I never expected him to pull a stunt like that, cutting the ground right out from under me.

Mom and Dad had just walked in and had no idea what had actually happened.

All they saw was their son about to jump off the building.

It scared the life out of them.

Son, what are you doing?

Get down from there, now!

Mom, Dad, Sis is framing me, saying I stole the money she earned working.

I won't be blamed for something I didn't do.

My brother made a show of jumping, but his hands were clamped tight around the balcony railing.

There wasn't the slightest real intention behind it.

And Mom and Dad had no time to think it through.

Son, Mom's on your side.

We won't let your sister frame you!

After Mom and Dad soothed and coaxed him, my brother's meltdown finally started to settle.

The two of them held their son, terrified.

Not daring to leave his side for a second.

Then.

Their eyes red, they glared at me with pure venom. You'd even frame your own brother. Do you have any conscience at all?

We'd be better off raising a dog than raising you.

Corinne Barnes, get out!

We don't want you anymore!