My boyfriend and his so-called sister checked into a hotel and got caught during a prostitution sting operation.
When I went to bail him out, he had hickeys all over his neck and was busy comforting her while she sobbed into her hands.
Her apartments lock broke, and she was so scared, so I stayed with her, he said.
If this had been before, I wouldve flipped out and demanded answers.
But this time, I didnt want to play the jealous, crazy girlfriend anymore.
I calmly signed the release papers and didnt say a word.
My friend from the operation team asked, Family?
I shook my head. Just neighbors.
Then I looked down and texted my mom.
[That arranged marriage you mentioned? Fine, Ill do it. Give me three days, and Ill come home.]

When we left the station, Gwyneth Averill, still sniffling, climbed into the passenger seat of my car.
I didn't feel like arguing, so I started the car. Just as I put my hand on the wheel, she grabbed my arm.
Except, she wasnt looking at me. She turned to my boyfriend Gerard Morgenthal instead.
Im scared. I dont like riding in someone elses car, she said, her eyes filled with tears, her nose red. She looked like the very definition of helpless.
I pulled her hand off me. Then get out.
The air in the car instantly froze until Gwyneths tears spilled over, and she started crying.
From the backseat, Gerards voice came sharp.
Yvaine, do you always have to be so harsh? You know shes traumatized because of her brothers situation. Cant you just be a little considerate? he snapped. Get out. Ill drive.
Before I could respond, he got out, yanked open my door so hard that it rattled, and let the freezing wind rush in.
I shivered but didnt move, just sat there and stared at him.
The always-calm Gerard was suddenly rough and impatient. He actually unbuckled my seatbelt and dragged me out of the car.
I stumbled, nearly falling to my knees, but managed to catch myself.
Without looking at me, he slid into the drivers seat and leaned over to gently touch Gwyneths hair. Hush now. Ill take you home first.
Oh, Gerard, youre so good to me! Gwyneth said, throwing me a smug little look.
Before he drove off, Gerard left me with one sentence. Youre an adult. Figure out your own way home. Ill be back after I drop her off.
I stood there, frozen, as their car sped away. Before they turned the corner, I saw that bitch lean over and kiss his cheek.
Just then, my phone buzzed, and I picked it up with my fingers still stiff.
Sweetheart, did you see Glenns photo?
Glenn Londonthe guy my mom wanted me to marry.
Tall and good-looking.
On the other end, my mom sounded relieved.
Oh, sweetheart, youre finally growing up. Your dads getting old. Over the years, hes been furious about you running away from home. Its good that youre coming back.
I looked up at the insects buzzing around the streetlight, my thoughts scattered.
I ran away all those years ago because I didnt want this kind of life.
Then I met Gerard, and for a while, I thought Id hit the jackpot.
Seven years. I stood by him through everything from nothing to something.
But every time I brought up the future, hed just say, Its too soon. I had quietly terminated my pregnancies because of that. More than once.
I was so naive, thinking his love alone would be enough.
But now, I can't take it anymore.
In the end, I took a cab home.
Gerard mustve felt guilty because he came home not long after.
He walked in just as I was packing my things. Clothes were out of my wardrobemost of them stuffed into bags already.
Why are you packing your clothes? he asked, looking uncertain.
Decluttering, I said flatly, hoping he'd just take a shower.
The cloying scent of perfume on him made me feel nauseous.
He hesitated for a moment, not sensing anything amiss, and continued talking to himself.


Well, losing it might not be the worst thing. When we get married, we can just buy another one. Or maybe even upgrade to a bigger place. What do you think?
Gerard sounded like he was seriously picturing our future. He kept sneaking glances at me, watching for a reaction. I noticed, of course, but I pretended I didnt.
Normally, Id be over the moonprobably crying happy tears. But now? I didnt feel like shedding even a single tear for him.
My coldness killed his vibe. He could tell I was upset, but he wasnt about to try and fix things. The fact hed even made an effort tonight was rare enough.
When he went to shower, his phone started buzzing nonstop. The noise was driving me crazy, so I picked it up and glanced at the screen.
Gwyneth had sent him a bunch of photoswedding photos of the two of them. Some in classic outfits, some in modern style.
My chest tightened, the pain dull but heavy.
So, this is how it was. His impatience was reserved just for me.
I thought back to the time Id excitedly dragged him to look at wedding outfits with me. But he bailed on me every single time.
Its all the same. Just pick something, hed said.
That frown of his is still burned into my memory.
His impatience with me? That was real.
And the tenderness in those dozens of photos? That was real, too.
What the hell are you doing?
Suddenly, steam rolled in as Gerard stormed out of the bathroom, snatching the phone out of my hand. He yanked it so hard that I fell onto the bed.
Do you not understand the concept of privacy? His face was flushed from the hot shower, but his voice was ice cold, sending a chill down my spine.
I glanced down at my hand. His grip had left a scratch, and now it was bleeding.
Honestly, even if he hadnt caught me, I wouldnt have scrolled any further. Id already seen it all beforethe thousands of flirty messages. Id read them all one sleepless night, from midnight to sunrise.
By the time I was done, my eyes were swollen, but I still had to fake being fine, pretending Id just woken up.
Who wouldve guessed? Seven years of being together, and our conversations were always just menagging, pleading, trying to spark something. Once in a while, if he was in the mood, hed toss me an emoji as a reply.
I was nothing but a clown.
Sorry, I muttered, lowering my eyes. I wont touch your phone again.
He froze, caught off guard by my reaction.
Those photos Gwyneth said trying on wedding dresses is exhausting, so I I just helped her try some on. Thats all, he stammered. You know her brother passed away. I was just doing this for him. Dont get the wrong idea.
I stayed quiet, letting him stumble through his pathetic excuses.
Kurt, Gwyneths brother, had been Gerards friend. Back when Gerard was struggling to get his business off the ground, Kurt rushed to deliver a flashdrive to him but ended up in a car accident.
He was rushed to the ER but didnt make it.