Neutral Means Betrayal,He Chose Neutral,So I Chose to Leave

For the six years Rodney Butler and I were together, he never once took my side over my best friend's. He stayed perfectly neutral, always.

When Sophie and I argued, Rodney told me to be the bigger person.

These things are never one person's fault. I can't just take your side because you're my girlfriend.

On my birthday, Rodney's gift always came in twoone for me, one for Sophie.

"It's your birthday. You really want your best friend to be the only one without a present?"

When Sophie got sick, Rodney stayed up all night at her bedside.

"I looked after you the same way when you were sick. She's your best friend. Shouldn't I treat her the way I treat you?"

Then Rodney proposed to me. And even the diamond ring came in a matching pair.

I looked down at the ring he'd just slid onto my finger, and all at once I felt utterly, completely done.

"Rodney, do you know something? In a relationship, staying neutral is betrayal."

And with that, I didn't look at him again. I turned and walked out of my own proposal.

You don't get to play the fair judge in my life anymore.

Betrayal dressed up as neutrality. It made my skin crawl.

Seeing me leave, Rodney grabbed my wrist.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"A day like today, and you have to throw a fit? You have to make an ugly scene out of it?"

I said nothing. My eyes went instead to Sophie Fox's hand, where she stood off to the side.

A moment ago Rodney had taken out two identical engagement rings.

One for me. One for Sophie.

The delight on Sophie's face when she got hers had made my heart drop, and drop again.

I pulled my gaze back to Rodney.

"I don't want to stand on one side of the scale anymore."

"From now on you can run to her all you like. No need to wear yourself out keeping things perfectly balanced."

Before Rodney could get a word out, Sophieglowing with joy a second agocame hurrying over, her eyes rimmed red.

She fumbled to pull the ring off and give it back to Rodney.

"I'm sorry, Melissa, this is my fault, it's all my fault, please don't be angry."

"You and Rodney have been together so many years, and you've finally made it all the way to marriage. Don't fight over something this small."

Small?

My boyfriend put a ring on another woman on the day he proposed to me.

That's small?

Before Sophie could get the ring off, Rodney's hand clamped down over hers.

"You don't have to give it back. I gave it to you, so it's yours."

"This is Melissa's fault. She's being petty. There's no reason for you to feel bad."

Rodney's words nearly made me laugh.

"My fault? I'm being petty?"

"You give her a ring like thiswhat, so after we're married she can sleep between us?"

I didn't spare his feelings, and Rodney's face changed in an instant.

"Melissa Summers! I'm your boyfriend, and Sophie is your best friend!"

"Do you even hear what you're saying?"

Rodney had planned the proposal for today and invited a good number of our mutual friends to witness it.

Now, watching the two of us fight harder and harder, they came crowding forward.

"Come on, Rodney, a day like today, and a grown man like you is picking a fight with Melissa?"

"Exactly. And honestly, I don't blame Melissa for being upset. Look at youwho does this? Do you not know what an engagement ring means? How can you hand out two of them at once?"

"Any other day, fine. But today, of all days? You're doing this on purpose, aren't youmaking her look like a fool?"

"All right, all right, Melissa. Rodney knows he's in the wrong now. Take a breath. We'll make him apologize."

Listening to my friends all talking over each other, all I felt was the sting rising behind my nose.

Even an outsider could see how far Rodney had gone.

As the boyfriend who'd been with me for six years, did he genuinely not see it, or was he choosing not to?

Even now, with everything laid bare, Rodney kept his neck stiff and refused to apologize.

"Only Melissa's is a proposal ring. The one for Sophie just happens to look the same. It's not the big deal you're all making it out to be."

"Sophie is Melissa's best friend. I was only looking out for her feelings. How is that wrong?"

There was nothing left to fight about, and I was done fighting it.

I slid the diamond ring off my finger, pressed it into Rodney's hand, and walked straight out of the proposal.

If what he gave me was the same as what he gave someone else,

then I, Melissa Summers, didn't want it.

I took a cab straight home.

I hadn't been home long when Rodney and Sophie showed up behind me.

Sophie hovered in the doorway, timid, as if she didn't dare come in.

Rodney and I had gotten together freshman year of college. Sophie went back even furthershe'd been my roommate.

Her family didn't have much. Her allowance was the smallest in the whole dorm.

For four years I covered the gaps for her out of my own scholarship and living money, and I'd often grab two meals in the cafeteria line so she'd have one too.

Back when Rodney and I were dating, Sophie tagged along everywhere as our little third wheel. Almost every date was the three of us.

After graduation, we all stayed and worked in Chicago.

I rented an apartment then, and knowing Sophie didn't have spare cash, I let her split it with me.

I say split, but in a city where a shared place ran two grand on average, I only took a token three hundred a month from her.

Then a year ago, Rodney bought a place, and we were getting ready to move in together.

Rodney waved it off with one grand gesture.

"Sophie should just move in with us. The place I bought is plenty big anyway."

"Melissa and I aren't even married yet. It won't be any trouble having you there."

"You two are so close, and you're just a young woman. Leaving you here on your own to rentI'm sure Melissa wouldn't feel right about it either."

Sophie had looked at me too, all pitiful.

"Melissa, if you leave, I can't afford a place this expensive on my own."

I went soft and agreed to let Sophie move in for the time being.

I never imagined that the softness I showed back then would one day become the knife pointed at me.

When I said nothing, it was Rodney who cracked first.

"Melissa Summers, you're pretty pleased with yourself right now, aren't you? All those people taking your side."

"Really something, you are. You just had to make me lose face in front of that many people."

The whole night had left me worn down to nothing.

"I'm not the one who made you lose face."

"What you did made you lose face. Don't go dumping every mess on me."

Rodney's face went a little pale with anger.

"Everything I did, who was it for? Wasn't it for you?"

"You and Sophie are so close. Wasn't I just helping you look after her?"

"That's love me, love my dog! And you? Look at what you did tonight. So now I'm in the wrong for helping you?"

As Rodney and I kept escalating, Sophie edged forward, timid, and the moment she opened her mouth her eyes went red.

"Melissa, have you secretly resented me all along?"

"Why didn't you tell me sooner? If you had, I never would've stayed on here, freeloading."

I turned to look at her.

"I thought we were all adults."

What I meant was this.

Adults' lives each have their own boundaries.

I thought everyone understood that.

The moment I finished speaking, fat tears came rolling down Sophie's face.

"Okay, okay, Melissa, don't be angry. You're the only friend I have left. I really don't want to lose you."

"I'll go pack right now. I'll move out immediately."

But instead of going into her room, she turned to face Rodney and bowed low.

"Thank you for everything you and Melissa have done for me these past years. I'll go now."

"I hope the two of you have a good life. Don't fight over me anymore"

Before Sophie could finish, Rodney stepped forward and looked her dead in the eye, his voice leaving no room for argument.

"I'm the one who told you to move in. Without my say-so, who gave you permission to leave?"

He yanked Sophie behind him and turned to me with the look you'd give an enemy.

"This is my apartment, and nobody gets to make you go!"

"If someone has to turn this into a mess where no one gets any peace, then she's the one who leaves!"

I had come back to pack up my things anyway.

But when Rodney said that, my eyes still stung, and I could barely hold back the tears threatening to spill over.

A year ago, in this very living room, Rodney had held me and spun me around, giddy with joy.

"Melissa! We finally have a home of our own."

"We'll get married in this apartment, and from now on you'll be the lady of the house!"

Barely a year.

And now he was telling me to get out.

In that moment, I didn't want to waste another word on Rodney.

I turned and walked into the master bedroom and began packing my things.

Once everything was packed, I dragged my suitcase toward the door.

As I passed through the living room, Rodney's voice rose again.

His teeth were clenched, and the voice that came out sounded like a stranger's.

"If you set one foot out that door today, coming back later won't be so easy."

"Melissa Summers, I've already put up with more than enough from you."

My steps halted, and I turned to look at the man I had loved for six whole years.

His brow, his eyesevery feature was still so familiar, and yet he felt like a stranger, frighteningly so.

The day the eighteen-year-old boy confessed to me, his cheeks had gone red with shyness.

"Melissa, I like you. Will you give me a chance to win you over?"

"Don't worry, I'll treat you well. I'll never let you suffer."

But somewhere along the way, three people became the normal shape of our life together.

On the surface he stayed neutral, but his heart had already made its choice for him.

He'd said he would never let me suffer.

Yet every bit of suffering came from him.

Seeing me stop, Rodney visibly let out a breath.

He reached out to take the suitcase from my hand.

"See, isn't this better? Sophie and I are the people closest to you. Why did you have to blow it up like this?"

"All right, I'll put your things back. No more scenes from now on."

"Today you really were being unreasona"

Before Rodney could finish, I stepped back, away from his outstretched hand.

"Rodney, go be the closest person to her, then."

"I won't crowd in with her."

With that, I didn't spare him another glance. I turned and walked straight out the door.

I had just reached the little courtyard when Sophie's voice came from behind me.

"Melissa, Melissa, don't go! I'm the one who should leave!"

"Wait for me, don't go!"

Sophie's voice cut off abruptly.

I turned my head just in time to see Sophie chasing out the door, and Rodney grabbing her by the arm.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"It's so late now. It isn't safe for a girl to be out alone."

Those words, and the tears fell before I could stop them.

Sophie was a girl. What was I, then?

I wiped them away hard and turned on my heel.

This time I didn't look back.

Once I was in the cab, I called the owner of Rodney's rival company.

"I accept the offer."

Years ago, when Rodney graduated and wanted to start his own company, I backed him with everything I had.

That little startup had gone from a team of three or four people to a company with a few dozen employees.

It wasn't big, but building it up in two short years was no small thing.

The rival firm in the same field had been trying to poach me for a long time, and every time I'd turned them down.

Now, though, it was time.

It was late, so I found the first hotel I could and checked in, planning to sort out the rest the next day.

But early the next morning, I was woken by knocking at the door.

"Sophie, please don't be angry with me anymore, okay?"

"Just come back, and I'll move out of the apartment right away. I promise I won't get in the way of your life again."

Sophie's words almost made me laugh.

"So what you're saying is, if I don't come back, you'll just keep living there with a clear conscience?"

"The apartment? Sounds like you already think of it as your home."

At that, Sophie's eyes went red at once.

"Melissa, I that's not what I meant. We've been friends for so many years, you know me, I'm just bad with words."

"But I really don't have any other choice."

I raised an eyebrow.

"No choice? Haven't I already moved out of that so-called home of yours? Haven't I already given you your way out?"

"So what are you here for today? Do you actually expect me to forgive you?"

Sophie's tears came down in heavy drops, and her shoulders began to shake hard.

"Ever since college, my grades were never as good as yours, my work was never as strong as yours, and I was never as pretty as you."

"I know this is wrong, but I really am at the end of my rope. You know how it is, my family doesn't have money, there are so many of us kids, and if I want to stay in Chicago, all I have is you and Rodney to lean on."

"I have nowhere to go, Melissa. Can't you understand me?"

I took a step back, putting distance between us.

Seeing that, Sophie only cried harder.

"Melissa, can you really not forgive you? I honestly think of you as my friend."

"Hit me, yell at me. As long as it gets it out of your system, I'll do whatever you want."

"This whole thing is my fault. I'm willing to bear all the consequences."

I shook my head.

"You are in the wrong here, so I can't say I forgive you."

"But in all of this, the one who did wrong first is Rodney. It's not your place to carry the blame for him."

Seeing that I wasn't going to budge, Sophie stepped right up, grabbed my hand, and tried to slap it against her own face.

"Melissa, hit me. I know you're still angry."

"Please, just hit me. Then maybe I'll feel a little better"

Her sudden move startled me.

I was about to pull my hand back when Rodney's furious shout reached my ears.

"Melissa Summers, what do you think you're doing!"

"If you have a problem, take it out on me. What kind of person picks on Sophie?"

"She was so worried about you she didn't sleep all night, and this morning she went hotel to hotel looking for you, and this is how you treat her"

Rodney hadn't even finished when I whipped my hand back and cracked it across his face.

His words cut off. His head snapped to the side, and when he turned back there was pure disbelief in his eyes.

I flexed my wrist and gave a cold little laugh.

"She wanted me to hit her. I didn't feel like it."

"But since you showed up, I'll hit you instead. No need to thank me."

At the sound of my voice, Rodney grabbed Sophie and yanked her behind him, shielding her like she needed protecting.

"If I'd known you'd still be acting like this today, I never would've let Sophie come find you."

"Sophie didn't do anything wrong. I only looked after her because of youwhat have you got to sulk about? Being good to her, is that suddenly a crime?"

"Melissa, since when did you get so aggressive?"

That instinctive move to shield herit stung my eyes like a needle.

"You say neither of you did anything wrong. Fine. Then let me ask you this, Rodney."

"If it had been me. If I were the one being that good to your friend, if I let your friend move into our home, if I prepared two of every birthday gift, if I said yes to a proposal from you and your friend at the same time"

"Would you still think your friend and I did nothing wrong? Could you accept it?"

His livid face froze in that instant.

His lips moved without sound, and something wavered in his eyes.

That was when Sophie clutched at his arm.

"Rodney, let's just go. Melissa's still angry right now."

"We can talk it out properly once she's calmed down."

That snapped him out of it. His face darkened again.

"Melissa, this is our last chance."

"Think it over carefully. I built my own company straight out of college. I'm ahead of everyone my age."

"If we break up, you'll never find a better man than me."

I slapped him again, hard.

This time I put everything into it.

"Rodney, what makes you think my worth as a person is decided by the man next to me?"

"Whoever's next to me, I'm still me."

His face was full of fury and he was about to say something when a smooth, lovely voice cut in.

"Oh, Mr. Butler, listen to you."

"Anyone who didn't know better would think that company's success was all your doing."